Thursday, 5 April 2012

Maxim understands video games media

Overt misogyny in video game and it's related media is no big surprise (see previous post), be it ignorantly dismissing any female with hatred and suspicion or cynically exploiting the terminally lonely with the cult of the "Gam3r Grrl." Well "modern day rape bible", Maxim magazine is practising both, with their maxim gamer girl competition. In which the entire world of video games is dragged through Satan's arse crack as, essentially, attention whores line themselves up for the judgement of shut-ins in the desperate attempt to give their lives meaning by the adulation of total strangers. And that in of itself is nothing new either. Without it the likes of Olivia Munn, Jessica Chobot  or the Frag Dolls wouldn't have a job. I mean how else are people with below average looks supposed to feel good about themselves?
We can dig it

Not really a noteworthy thing to comment about really. Were it not for how I found out about Maxim's continued quest to keep gamers locked in the dark ages, I would of just made another post about how some rip off  DLC or tell you a story about how Ellie Gibson would gladly send all of the staff of Eurogamer to Hades if it meant getting her idea for a novel published. But I found it rather interesting to find it mentioned by Aoife (no, I don't know how it's supposed to be pronounced either) Wilson: a producer/presenter for the fuck-awful, Ginx production company. Fair enough if you hate the objectification of women in gaming. But if it weren't for lonely, male gamers, hand sexing their way through your awful video content, you wouldn't have any place in gaming. because your writing, production and presenting is painfully dire. Plus any sort of cosplay = twat
Please love me I'm just like you...join my tumblr, like and retweet, kthnxbai

That's not the issue either, because one expects everyone in television is a  fucking hypocrite. But it would seem a lot of you have trouble working out what exactly a girl gamer is. Seeing as most gamers' definition of a attention whore is a cosplayer who didn't give them their phone number. Ok, because deep down I care, so I'm gonna wrap this whole shit up right now for you.
What is a girl gamer?  Simple, it's someone that enjoys playing video games, who was born female. And that's it. They play games and have XX chromosomes. Look at the picture below...

You can't see what she's doing, but any gamer can tell you, she's playing a game. The glossed over, intense glare in her eyes, her face stuck in a  mask of concentration. She is girl playing a game. A girl gamer. Her gender and what she looks like are not important. She's too busy capturing the flag. Now lets look at an attention whore shall we?

"Hey guys, I'm a gamer and a  girl, looking for a decent game online. Unless you're scared of being whupped by a girl, hee-hee! ;p "  That person is not playing a game. They're posing for a photograph so lonely bastards can shower them with adulation and/or buy whatever ever product they're shilling. be it a website, kickstarter project or amazon wishlist. Understand?

someone playing a game

attention whore
And for the sake of balance here's a male attention whore
hey handsome

 I'm not gonna let the men off the hook either. Granted, almost no males in gaming have used their looks to any advantage. Mainly because they're all ugly as sin. But the climate in which girls either feel they have to remain anonymous or lick a PSP is down to the way you chaps have been behaving for the past two decades. Is it any wonder some girls go the attention whore route? Whether it's for personal or professional reasons, it's like shooting fish in a barrel, which  -in turn- continues the vicious circle of regular girl gamers getting abuse because they dare admit what gender they are or -and you know I'm right on this one- commit the crime of not being attracted to you.
A very wise person once told me: "no one is obligated to be in love with you"  So just because you chance upon a moderately attractive girl who shares your interest in video games, doesn't mean she's obligated to fancy you because you unlocked the recon armour on Halo 3. And likewise, someone isn't gonna go out with you, no matter how many pairs of shoes or games you buy on their amazon wishlist. Take a step back, remember video games are supposed to be a fun pastime and maybe realise men and women are much more alike than you think and there's no grand, female conspiracy, not to have sex with you. So stop actiing like the knuckle draggers, you see working for OXM's website.  Attention whore and hand-sexer alike...just stop. If you both acted with a little more self respect and  less self loathing, we'd all feel the benefit. Unless you're a cosplayer, in which case, go fuck yourself.


  1. Brilliant! Absolutely brilliant!

  2. that's nor brilliant at all, mate. girls do have the privilege to play games too, ya know.

  3. Decent article, I am a girl-gamer and have the glazed stare of concentration whilst sneaking round behind enemy lines to open up a flanking position. I see your point with this article but it is difficult to read through your ranting and recognise that you aren't bashing the female gender. You should open with the girl gamer/attention whore pictures... It would set the article in better context, spurring the reader onwards.

  4. Spoken like a true gent. Couldn't agree more with what has been said, but a greater threat exists, it is caused by us gamer guys, they are known as Bronys!!!